Saturday, November 29, 2008

jokes, folks

From a Georgia Straight article written by Guy MacPherson about comic Stewart Francis..

He’s an economical writer, too. There’s not a word of fat in his act. Take this brilliantly simple joke: “I love blind dates,” he says, leading us down one path, “because you can stare at their tits.” Such precision. The gag is easy enough to parse, but try coming up with something so beautifully funny. That takes talent. Like this one: “My impression of a lazy porn star: ‘Don’t make me come over there.’”

And he’ll often give you two or three laughs per joke. “I don’t think it’s fair to judge people on their looks,” he’ll tell us earnestly. “Especially the ugly ones.” Great punchline, but wait, there’s more. “They probably have feelings.” He goes from good guy to jerk to soulless asshole in three quick steps.


Same with this one: “My wife and I have decided we don’t want children.” Fair enough. “If anyone does, we can drop them off tomorrow.” Ouch. “The fat one has asthma.” Not only does he not want his own offspring, but he offhandedly dehumanizes one completely.

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Noone and Stella

I've been meaning to write this post for a while. Now here it is. Not much time for blogging now that I'm no longer a bum. Working full-time for once in my life means being more selective of how spare time is spent. What I'm wondering is, come February, will there be any spare time at all?

A little over a month ago my grandma passed away. Her given name was Muriel, but she was known affectionately as Noone. She was my last living grandparent and the only one that I had ever met. She lived in New Zealand and had visited us here in Canada several times when I was younger. At least once, when I was elementary school age, she slept in my bed and I slept on the floor. Those visits stopped a while ago as her health got worse. I had also been to New Zealand a few times, living with her for a month in 1992 and visiting her in 1999.

Anyway, I wasn't that close to her, due mostly to the distance between us. But it's still been a tough go, as that generation of my family has now passed. My mom was over there for the final couple of weeks of Noone's life as they knew her passing was imminent. Soon after my mom arrived back, Stella, one of her dogs, passed away. What was shocking about that was that of her three dogs Stella was thought to be the youngest and healthiest. She was adopted from a friend of the family and, in hindsight, hid her ailments well. Too well.

I don't really have much else to say about any of this. I just wanted to put it on here as a way of honoring. I know it's not much, but it's more than nothing.

"Let's let nature take its course."